I was given a task to write an engagement email, to be sent to our subscribers.

The mail’s content needed to be about “How to help the sales team make a transition to CRM from Spreadsheets?”

What I managed to write was decent, but not great.

Then, I sought help from one of our founders who has 15 years of experience in sales.

He is beyond amazing with words.

His suggestions did magic to the copy.

And, I am here to share that magic with you all.

Old Subject Line (Good):

Having Trouble Moving Sales Team From Spreadsheets To CRM?

 

New Subject Line (Great):

When salesperson says: Spreadsheets are easy but CRM is not.

 

Example of a Good Copy (Email Content):

It is not easy to change the habits and leave your comfort zone.

• Ability to maintain notes about clients, notes that can help to move the clients closer to the purchasing decision.
• Ability to find a touch base with clients, who have not given work in recent months. Who knows, pinging them might open up new sales opportunities.
• Ability to take a 360-degree view of deals in progress. Hence, prioritizing to move high-value deals to closure.
• Ability to assign tasks and reminders about following up with a certain client. A slip of the mind may cost you a deal.

• Constantly reminding the sales team about the benefits of the CRM.
• Help the sales team import their data from excel into the CRM.
• Weekly connect with each member of the sales team to attend to any problems they might have with respect to CRM.
• Conducting the restricted access tasks on behalf of sales representatives.
• Anything else needed to bridge the gap.

 

Example of a Great Copy (Email Content):

Morning caffeine is good. I drink it every day. One day I thought, I will not have my morning coffee. I will have something healthy?

Oh boy, by the evening I was feeling ‘cranky’. It is difficult for me to change my habits.

When I start my workday, I look for the sales data. I open my excel. I have been using excel since I started my career in sales. It has data listed in the way I want it. My spreadsheet has color codes in it (do you use color codes?). I know the important rows and the ones which I can ignore. It is like my morning coffee.

This CRM is like a healthier alternative ‘say- Green Tea’ to my morning coffee. I know it is healthy for me, but I am so much used to my morning coffee. It’s super challenging for me to make the shift.

However, if CRM can help me move prospects closer to purchasing decision, or to find otherwise lost business opportunities, or prioritize and close more high-value deals. I would be greatly motivated to switch to this green tea called CRM.

But, addictions are too sticky to get rid of. There will be times I would want to go back to my old habit. I shall need somebody to stop me from giving up. A companion who will help me make this transition smoother. A companion who will be able to withstand my mood swings. A companion who will keep me from deviating. A companion who won’t leave until I reach my goal to quit caffeine.

Here is a little hack that helped me and my sales team cross the barrier.

We brought in a person who is dedicated to helping the sales team to make the best use of CRM. He constantly reminds the sales team about the benefits of the CRM. He helped the sales team import their data from excel into the CRM. He stays in touch with each member of the sales team to attend to any problems they might have with respect to CRM.

This whole exercise brought in a tremendous increase in our revenue.

Would you be interested to quit your morning caffeine ;)?

Best,
Aditi

From Good To Great:

A good copy is the one that just tells a solution to the problem.

A great copy is where you enter a conversation into the reader’s mind. Empathize with him. And the solution comes in the natural flow of that conversation.

Could you spot the differences in the two copies?

Would be happy to read your thoughts in the comments section.

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